Berlin...

I don't think I'll ever get tired of the feeling behind getting on a plane and falling into a daze for hours or days and waking up in a very different country in a very different part of the world. Last time I came to Germany, I remember it being somewhat scary and overwhelming. It was Munich for Oktoberfest and it was the second stop on my tour and it just felt so foreign. This time, the feeling is different, like I'm catching it in stride, like any town in the world I want to be mine can instantly become that. It's cold here, and drizzling, and the colors are beautiful, so fucking beautiful. I came to check into my room and my hands were so cold, I couldn't hold a pen...like that. It looks like this...

I haven't slept in days and my eyes are caving into my skull. I didn't sleep on the plane because I sat next to a Girl who is in town for a runway show - we picked her up in New York. I don't like to talk much on planes or in life, but we started talking and never really stopped. Beautiful girl. Model. Dark. Funny. Precious. She was on the plane with an entire staff of girls in town for the same show - flown in from New York. She was afraid of turbulence and for stretches, I wanted to kiss her or hold her hand because of it and for the sake of neither of us forgetting that flight. I didn't - can't assume the entire world behaves in the manner I do all the time. Instead, we agreed to meet at some place, at some point...out on this town. See what's what, fall for a couple hours or days or never see each other again. I prefer to make life behave in such a manner.

It's one or something in the afternoon here. I have to make my way over to the O2 at some point, or to some ticket broker at some point to get this Muse ticket. Of course I don't have it yet. I'm exhausted but fueled, oh so fucking fueled. I just spent the last 2 hours wandering the city on foot, waiting to stumble upon my hotel or the street of my hotel before I stopped to buy a map...so I've seen a lot. I don't care why I do the things I do anymore and have instead learned to accept them and myself. This city feels heavy to me, beautifully and romantically and tragically heavy and I'm floating through it. I need to sleep but I need to wander, I need to walk, I need to see what's out there. And when the legs start to give and there appears that tired ache behind my eyes and my beating heart tells me to stop to fucking stop to take a fucking breath, I compromise on something that looks something like this...

And press the fuck on.