So it begins. If at any point you feel I’m cramming perception down your throat, you’re right. I am.
It’s funny. I have been in Tinseltown for nearly eight months now. My greatest fear is that I am losing touch. Think about it. If you live in the circus long enough, things that were once strange, unsettling and odd become the norm. At some point, Gypso becomes part of the gang. You learn to look past the fact that she is limbless and executes daring feats of aerial grace with only the power of her teeth. I have yet to decide if this is a perceptive regression. We’ll come back to that…
I was driving down Hollywood Boulevard today. And for the record, I am not street dropping. It simply adds to the ambiance of the story. There were two cars in front of me. It was right at the magic hour of the day. Right around five when the sun is punching out on my side of the globe. There is something about it that always sets me at ease. As if at that rare window in time, the air becomes happy…available for all to consume. Or…at least all save the two fine gentlemen piloting the cars in front of me. We’ll call them Denny and Lenny.
So we three are driving along. Reilly, Denny and Lenny. Thick as thieves. There were no stop signs, and surprisingly little traffic at that location and time in Los Angeles. Lenny decides to stop in the middle of the road. Naturally, Denny and I follow suit. Then, Lenny springs out of the driver’s seat. Seeing Denny’s reverse lights go up, it was obvious he knew something I didn’t. When Lenny began screaming obscenities, aggressively swinging a flashlight, and sprinting after Denny’s car - which was now redlining it in reverse - I realized that maybe we weren’t quite as thick as I had idealistically hoped. Pulling off to the side of the road, I watched through the rearview as Denny’s car sped over a small hill. Lenny gave chase until they were both out of sight. I laughed. After all, happy air was still pumping through my world. My Los Angeles.
What happens next is the same thing that happens to me every day. The feeling of having your heart broken with no leads…no suspects. Just…empty.
The air was no longer sweet. My drunk was gone…my orgasm was over. I shut off my car and sat there, wondering what to do next. I couldn’t help but think about the circus…inspired by my two good friends, Lenny and Denny. What has happened to me? Why am I laughing?
Should I be crying?
