So I've Got This Rocking Chair...

I think it was my grandfather's. I've got a desk, also my grandfather's. There are some boxes with my clothes in them, some electrical cords that will connect to things and make things work when I eventually come back home. There's a bottle of Jack on the bookshelf, where my books used to be, about 2 swigs are left. I don't think I'll finish it. There are backpacks, so many backpacks...clothes on the floor. A bike. A bed. European condoms. Tide...

On Friday, I'm gone from Kings Road and I think it's starting to settle in, finally. There's a race in San Francisco this weekend, Escape From Alcatraz that attracts 2000 of the baddest Tri-Aths in the world. I can feel it coming. I can taste it. My guts are starting to roll. After that, I'm here for the week before Vegas to meet the family for a much needed beat before a goodbye to Los Angeles before I get on a plane to Bangkok on May 15th, that Saturday afternoon. Flying fascinates me, absolutely. I have this talent of being able to shut off my body, to find stillness on a plane and sit for hours and hours and then it lands and I come back to life and step out into a new and bizarre and enthralling world. Then something takes over me, fucking invades me and I just breathe it in and let it in my brains and blood. I'm going to meet John Durban. We have some important work to do, such important work to do. The thought of it makes my life feel beautiful. The thought of it makes me hungry for the world, makes me want to spit my pretty poison out onto the world. Due time. Due time.

When I get there, that world is going to be fast and out of control, and I'll have to find a way to slow it, to find control of it, to take control of it, to set fucking fire to it. Me and John. Watch us, wait for us. Every day, I try to make certain that I am not the same man I was the day before. And when I go away, I don't just pull wires, I rip them, fucking tear them so that they never again fit the way they did, so that I'm lost until I'm not. Then lost again.

This is right, no matter what comes.

This is right, no matter what comes.