Chansanity...

Sometime this morning I got out of bed and came to my computer. See, when I write I listen to music - it helps to fill in the empty. I was hearing some things for about an hour or two before I put on Cat Power's above cover of "I Found A Reason." I think this began around 10 AM. I heard it once and then another song came on before I set iTunes to repeat and clicked it again. Then I got into a groove until 1230 and realized that I had been listening to the same song for the past 150 minutes. This is a 2 minute song so I listened to it 75 times this morning. I can't really explain this. After lunch, I sat down at about 130 to get going again. It had been a good and tough and crushing day of work (seriously) and I didn't want to fuck with that so I did it again, the same thing. The same song. It's 630. 300 minutes divided by 2 means I've listened to the same song 225 times today. 225 times. Beautiful song, fucking beautiful, but even for an obsessive like me, I'm worried I am Chan Marshall right now. I fucking have to be, right? Whoever she is and whatever she does in real life is now my burden to wear at least for the rest of the night. I feel like I have to be sultry and wandering somewhere, like downtown around skid row, into the early hours of the morning, sleeping on the street, looking for either good meth or a good lover.