Someone recently asked me one of the most generic questions one can be asked...what is your greatest regret in life? And I thought about it and had to give the answer that I absolutely believe in. College, I never would have gone to college. I was sitting at home my junior year of high school on a bad night because I had done something bad in my life and because I'm a dramatic fool, I was 30-40% out the door, ready to drive off and leave town and start some sort of life, likely in California, because this state pulls to anyone growing up in the midwest. I should also make clear that what I'm saying has nothing to do with the home I was living in - it was as right a home as anyone could hope to live in - and everything to do with the world I was living in. And I told that person that I was judging based on what I would deem to be my own growth in the world, and that college sort of stalled that for me - of course that assumption only works if you take all the heart out of the scenario, and forget about the friends and girlfriends and battles and only look back on the academic world that so failed to inspire me. But I was cleaning out one of my online portfolios tonight and came across all the old stuff I made junior and senior year and I suppose some of the stuff when I first got to California. And I tried to think of what would have replaced those 4 years of my life - besides dropping out and taking off. And not just that, but everything these soon to be seen and ridiculous fuckers represent to me, still and I guess always. And maybe I'm doing the one thing I don't believe has much use in the world...the look back, but this was found in a stumble tonight, not in something I set out to do...and even though I do sometimes wish I would have went off looking for my life at 17 instead of 22, I see something like this and everything that goes with it and I feel bad for all I would have missed. But still...
This is the extended trailer for the first short I made in college. Link to the full version is on the YouTube page. Still can't believe that dance sequence was a one and done take. Clint Fucking Eastwood.
